Just got back from the playground and waterpark at Langley Events Center and both kids promptly fell asleep!
Had the most amazing time today. It was your average sunny summer day. But I've been complaining about summer lately - kids don't sleep enough, our routine is shot, it's too hot, they're cranky, I'm cranky blah blah blah.
Then we have this exquisite afternoon as I watch my son run through the water spray, shrieking and jumping with joy. Just an average summer day, but it totally reminded me of why I loved summer so much when I was a kid and how important it is to me to give my children this experience of summer. And how lucky I am to not have to work just for this one golden summer.
I once read a book entitled 'What Looks Like Crazy on an Ordinary Day'. I don't remember the book being all that, but I really loved the title. I would call today 'What Looks Like Joy on an Ordinary Day"! :)
Heading to Kits pool tomorrow!
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Sunday, July 25, 2010
If you can't say anything nice....
So my grand plan of writing here every Wednesday died a quick and somewhat painful death. I was lying in bed at 3 AM wondering why? Here it is: I've been cranky, stressed, overtired and overheated. I'm exhausted ALL the time. Tank is empty, has been for a while. I couldn't think of anything wise and pithy, or even nice, to write. Still can't think, yet here I am. I like my paper journal as I can (and did) write FUCK in angry large CAPS, red ink, across 3 pages both sides and then packed it up and felt better. This is so much more public than that, I'm just not sure I'm up for doing that! Yet that is how I've been feeling. Imagine if you will, those big red angry words.
In the spirit of that, it occurs to me that alot is said that is "not nice"... here are a few observations.
My friend (who will be nameless and I promise I won't tell enough of the story to make her identifiable) had an encounter with her 3 year old at the grocery store recently, where he kept yelling "f'ing b@$ch" at her louder and louder until she fled from the store, 3 year old in tow, baby tucked under her arm. He had never said that before. She was mortified. Humiliated. She shops at that store often and now wonders how she will ever show her face there again!
I was at the coffee shop recently and there were a couple of moms sitting having coffee with their toddlers playing around them. One of the toddlers was very determined to explore and he kept making a dash for the open door when anyone came in or out. He made one such dash as 2 women, perhaps in their mid-late twenties, were exiting. One of them turned to the mothers and said in a nasty tone "It's called BIRTH CONTROL, ladies!". She pranced out the door.
I was at the drug store with both kids last week. Caitlin was crying, Ryan was refusing to stay close to me and listening like a brick wall to all my requests and admonitions. I was getting frustrated. In the checkout line he declares in a sing-songy voice, "HATE me, YOU HATE me!" and then announces that I'm about to "Kill the baby". What?!?!? UGH. Where does he get this crap!?!? I know, I know, the wiser and more judgemental of you will tell me it comes from us, his parents, or our household somehow. Can you picture my big red angry word again? Please take a minute to do so! I take that out in my journal so it doesn't come out at my kids!!
I confess I used to be someone who saw these kids in the store lineup and assumed that the parenting was clearly very flawed. I send an apology to every mom I ever judged in such a way. Kids do have minds of their own. And preschoolers love to press buttons. And I'm not a bad mommy. I just need more rest. A few minutes of my own. Permission to be someone who gets angry and frustrated once in a while. And strives to show love, patience, kindness despite that. Imperfect. Please.
In the spirit of that, it occurs to me that alot is said that is "not nice"... here are a few observations.
My friend (who will be nameless and I promise I won't tell enough of the story to make her identifiable) had an encounter with her 3 year old at the grocery store recently, where he kept yelling "f'ing b@$ch" at her louder and louder until she fled from the store, 3 year old in tow, baby tucked under her arm. He had never said that before. She was mortified. Humiliated. She shops at that store often and now wonders how she will ever show her face there again!
I was at the coffee shop recently and there were a couple of moms sitting having coffee with their toddlers playing around them. One of the toddlers was very determined to explore and he kept making a dash for the open door when anyone came in or out. He made one such dash as 2 women, perhaps in their mid-late twenties, were exiting. One of them turned to the mothers and said in a nasty tone "It's called BIRTH CONTROL, ladies!". She pranced out the door.
I was at the drug store with both kids last week. Caitlin was crying, Ryan was refusing to stay close to me and listening like a brick wall to all my requests and admonitions. I was getting frustrated. In the checkout line he declares in a sing-songy voice, "HATE me, YOU HATE me!" and then announces that I'm about to "Kill the baby". What?!?!? UGH. Where does he get this crap!?!? I know, I know, the wiser and more judgemental of you will tell me it comes from us, his parents, or our household somehow. Can you picture my big red angry word again? Please take a minute to do so! I take that out in my journal so it doesn't come out at my kids!!
I confess I used to be someone who saw these kids in the store lineup and assumed that the parenting was clearly very flawed. I send an apology to every mom I ever judged in such a way. Kids do have minds of their own. And preschoolers love to press buttons. And I'm not a bad mommy. I just need more rest. A few minutes of my own. Permission to be someone who gets angry and frustrated once in a while. And strives to show love, patience, kindness despite that. Imperfect. Please.
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